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Conversations with my little brother
I don’t have much words for the loss of my brother, who died in January 2023 of suizide. At his funeral, I couldn’t think of anything to say so I sang two songs. In the months that followed, I don’t remember myself talking much, it was too tiresome, but I remember myself making these drawings. With them I could strech it out, strech out the minutes and hours. With them and my dreams at night I kept myself in a state between him being alive and him being gone. The drawings were a way to hold time and to not having to say goodbye just yet.
For several years now, I didn’t know what to do with these drawings. I stored them in a folder and stopped looking at them. I stopped showing them. They are very different from the paintings I made since then. They are dark, unpolished excerpts of a long nightmare and sunless winter. They are very personal and I always struggled with putting something “out there” I considered private. But I owe them a great deal, as a person and as an artist. For through making these drawings I could endure looking into the dark well my brothers loss opened up in me, and after some time, I saw reflected on the dark waters the single star I believed would still be there, behind the impenetrable clouds. When dawn came, a full-on glorious dawn, the visions passed, my brother passed beyond a hill, out of sight and returns to my dreams now only occasionally. There was a path for me too, one that I have been walking since, step by step. New sights have appeared as I walked, new themes and paintings occupied my thoughts. But knowing you and losing you shaped my path and keeps on colouring my world. And maybe, one day, after walking many leagues and traversing various terrains, when we are both ready, maybe our paths will cross again.
Composition of Emptiness and Fullness
The series “Composition of Emptiness and Fullness” explores Chapter 7, ‘Emptiness and Fullness’, of Sun Tzu’s “ The Art of War”. The influence of this work on military strategy spans from the 5th century BC to the present day, and is applied in politics, management, philosophy and social research (among other fields). There is also much to be gained from this work in the fields of art and painting.
How can we lead a life without conflict? Gather round a table and keep it in balance? For this, which cups need to be emptied, and which filled? Which colours can we add, and which would disrupt the overall picture? Where is disruption appropriate? This series of images reflect on the interplay between emptiness and fullness, both in the context of visual composition and, on a conceptual level, in social interaction.